Contradiction

I am one giant walking contradiction

And I always have been

I crave loyalty and monogamy
Yet I crave freedom

No strings attached

I love to drink

And I know it is a false reality for me

I do it sparingly

until I don't

I believe in free love

Yet I practice selective love

I slip on the cement over nothing

Yet I can run miles without falling

The color yellow looks dreadful on me

and it’s my favorite color

I dream about love that’s eternal

and I practice friends with benefits

I love makeup

Yet I rarely wear it

I believe in balance

I have it fucking tattooed on my arm

Yet I am constantly scrambling for solid ground

I practice vulnerability

and I attract men who have walls

I come off as extroverted

and I love to be alone

I am fiery as hell

Yet my heart is watery as the ocean

I am generally kind, thoughtful

But can bite

Hard

if you cross me

Or someone underserving

I am empathetic

I feel for you, for others

Yet I sometimes can’t feel for myself

I live a life without roots

when I crave stability

solidity

I am ungraceful

yet I can speak gracefully

I don't know what the fuck I'm doing in life

and I know exactly what I am choosing day in and day out